


Drowning

by Jovi_Star



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Caring Derek Morgan, Dad Aaron Hotchner, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s06e12 Corazón, F/M, Family Feels, Hurt Jennifer "JJ" Jareau, Hurt Spencer Reid, Other, Papa David Rossi, Protective BAU Team (Criminal Minds), Scared BAU Team, Scared Emily Prentiss, The BAU Team as Family (Criminal Minds), Worried BAU team, worried BAU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-16 01:55:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29324313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jovi_Star/pseuds/Jovi_Star
Summary: For a minute, everything changed. Reid was in the shed; the burnt smell of fish and the cold of the winter was all back.Tobias Hankel stood in front of him, arm outstretched and raised. A revolver was in hand, clicking echoed in his head when Tobai- no, Rapheal – was displeased. Willing to let God decide the young agent's fate.Everything glitched and Reid was back in the office, his team around him.Everything was alright.But it wasn't.( Or, in the s6xe12, Corazon, Reid gets drugged instead)
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner & David Rossi & Spencer Reid, Aaron Hotchner & Spencer Reid, Derek Morgan & Emily Prentiss, Emily Prentiss & Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau & Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/William LaMontagne Jr., Penelope Garcia & Derek Morgan, Penelope Garcia & Derek Morgan & Spencer Reid, Penelope Garcia & Jennifer "JJ" Jareau, Spencer Reid & David Rossi
Comments: 10
Kudos: 43





	1. Hopeless Wanderer

Spencer Reid was rushing down the stairs. His red shirt makes him stand in the dark halls of the Metro. In his hand is clasped a coffee cup. He desperately doesn’t want to spill his coffee. He’s already late to the office and spilling his coffee would just make things worse. 

People crowded around the entrance, waiting for the approaching train to arrive. Reid glanced down to pull his ringing phone out of his pocket; all the while rushing to the entrance. What he didn’t see was a man rushing the other way. The two men collided, returning grunts to each other. 

_Thank goodness!_ Reid's coffee was alright. No spills. _Whew._

The man that bumped into him was a tall shady man. He had a bald head that shone with the little light in the tunnels. His dark blue eyes glared at Reid and his mouth moved with apologizing. 

“I’m so sorry, dude!” He exclaimed. “I guess it’s just one of those days, huh?” 

“Yeah,” Reid grunted. He shied away from the man’s worrying touch on his arm. The stranger's germs on him, nope. No, thanks you. 

The agent sees the man's hand flash above his coffee but doesn’t worry too much about it. He needs to get to the office. Hotch is going to be pissed. 

“Again, dude, sorry.” The man utters a bit too happily. 

Reid sighs. “It’s fine. No harm done.” And just like that, Reid rushes onto the train, waiting for its passengers, off to the office he has been so desperately trying to get to. 

OoOoOoOoOoO 

Fresh cold air hit Reid as the elevator doors open. The office, as usual, is busy; agents and workers rushing through the halls. Rubbing a tried hand over his face, Reid stepped into the office. Sitting on the train, Reid was very paranoid. Taking long sips of his coffee, constantly glancing over his shoulder. _I know,_ he had thought to himself, _I feel like mom._ Spencer had just assumed it was from the coffee and maybe he was right. He didn’t get much sleep the night before, helping Morgan and the team with the Sanderson case. 

The slight noise of the office hit Reid hard, his head pounding and his eyes betraying him. Holding the bridge of his nose, Reid pushed open the glass doors, and rushed to the bullpen office. 

The team where already siting down, going over the murder. Emily Prentiss was swiping through the pictures on her tablet. She looked up at her friend, as Reid entered the room, pulling his tan messenger bag over his head. His hair was chaotic, pieces standing up, some sticking out and others doing their own thing. 

“Hey, you ok?” She asked. 

Derek Morgan looked up from his spot at the table, the pen flying around as he played with it in his hand. 

“Yeah, why?” Reid rushed out of his mouth. He kept his head down as he took his own seat next to the door kicking agent. 

Morgan stared at Reid. “You’re never late.” The older agent knew something was wrong. The kid wouldn’t look at him, he kept moving and talking too quickly and he just seemed......off. 

Reid didn’t answer him. To be fair, his head was pounding, and he barely heard the man. He just wanted to get this case done and over with. The bright lights blazed into his eyesight and exhausting was setting in, Reid just wanted to sleep and never wake up again. 

“Have we started the briefing yet?” Reid gripped his chair, his knuckles white. His head felt woozy and lightheaded. Everything swarmed. 

Penelope Garcia walked around Prentiss, looking at Reid with a slight smile on. Her orange hair bounced as her heels clicked on the floor. 

For a minute, everything changed. Reid was in the shed; the burnt smell of fish and the cold of the winter was all back. 

Tobias Hankel stood in front of him, arm outstretched and raised. A revolver was in hand, clicking echoed in his head when Tobai- no, Raphael – was displeased. Willing to let God decide the young agent's fate. 

Everything glitched and Reid was back in the office, his team around him. Well, not the full team. JJ was missing from her spot; now siting there was Ashly Seaver, the daughter of very beings the BAU hunts: a murder. 

Without JJ, Reid didn’t feel whole. A piece of his heart and himself was missing, and he wished it back dearly. 

Reid quickly sat down as Garcia found her own spot. 

“We’re about to.” She responded. 

“Then I’m not late.” Reid snapped then winced. 

“Oh. Yeah.” She got settled and lifted a remote to the TV. “Attention, intrepid BAU adventures. The land of Bermuda shorts, white leisure suits, and sansabelt slacks requests your presence.” 

Reid pulled out his files and pictures, keeping his head down. 

David Rossi looked up, eagerly. “Vegas?” 

Morgan took a sip of his own coffee. “Arizona.” He tired, hoping to win the competition. 

“Palm Springs.” Prentiss looked over at Morgan with a smile then back to Garcia. 

Reid lifted a hand to his temples and closed his eyes. Too much noise. Too much light. His friend's voices sounded distorted and wrong. His own limbs felt strange and weak, like imposters to his body. 

Aaron Hotchner looked up. “Please.” 

“I was going to say Miami but point well made.” Garcia tried to hide her laughter with a confused and funny look. “About the dizzying number of locales with unfortunate fashion tendencies. Here we go.” She clicked the remote and pictures appeared on the screen. 

“Shells on the eyes and mouth. You don’t see that every day.” Prentiss comments. 

“Not even in Miami.” Rossi agrees. 

Garcia nods her head. “3 victims, the last one found with a.....” 

“A decapitated cat?” Morgan finishes. Both Garcia and Morgan have disgusted faces. 

Reid’s head swam. His friends face blurred together, and images people popped into his blurred vision. His mouth tasted gross: like rotten eggs filled with salt. It was sour and bitter. Everything had a dull pain, like it was happening so far away that Reid couldn’t do anything to help. His heart hammered in his chest, knifes piecing his head. 

_“Worthless.”_

_“Loser.”_

_“Weird.”_

_“Stranger.”_

_“Gross.”_

Voices spat at him in both his ears to one. Somewhere familiar, others weren’t. Somewhere old and some new. Some Reid never wanted to hear again. 

Tobias appeared behind Rossi. He smiled and raised his fists above the oblivious older man. Flashbacks popped into Reid’s mind. Tobais—no it was Raphael, had the gun raised, straight at his head. He stared dead ahead with eyes glared and mouth curved. He needed to get out. 

He needed to get away. 

Away from him. 

Away from Tobias. 

Griping the chair with his ever again white knuckles, he slowly but quickly raised himself from the chair. He sniffled a groan that escaped his mouth. 

The team looked up at their friend. Reid was a pale, messy mess. Trying to hide his shaky hands and eyes glazed over. His mouth hung open, almost like he was about to spit. 

Morgan gazed worriedly at the genius. “You alright, Pretty Boy?” He asked. 

Reid was already, pain stalking slowly, at the door. A stale taste filled the doctor's mouth. It was delicious and disgusting. Eyes dropped down, opened ever so slightly; His is lips a pale blue. 

JJ suddenly stood up, noticing the wrong appearance of Reid. “Reid?” She asked. 

Hotch was looking at him, his face neutral but his voice betraying him. Aaron Hotchner, for once, sounded worried. “Reid, what is it?”   
Reid waved them off. “I’v-I’ve go-got to--” 

Stumbling out the door, Reid’s legs gave out. Felt like a punch to the gut, sending needles in his body haywire. A sharp, hot pain exploded at his head sending his vision dotting black, like stars dancing; shimmering to distract him. The doctor dimly feels his body hit the floor, sending him shaking and sputtering. He felt like he was back in that shed again, high and sweet, forgetting the horrors that came along. 

Yet this time, this was the horror. There was no high and sweet feeling, only darkness and pain. He gasped, straining to get air in his lungs, which refused to work. Hands touched him, turning him over and poking him. Looking up, the dim lights blinded his brown eyes. He tasted copper in his mouth, along with the delicious and disgusting stale flavor. 

Everything spun in his line of sight. The yelling and screaming screeched in his ears, making him squeeze his eyes shut; tears slipping down. Once again, he felt his body shake and jerk violently. 

And that was it. 

It was all over as fast as it appeared. 

OoOoOoOoOoO

A small sound caught JJ’s attention. Glancing over, Reid was gripping his chair as he eased himself out of it. His face a mask for the pain and agony he hid behind. 

Morgan gazed up at him. “You alright, pretty boy?” 

Watching Reid got to the door, JJ noticed his appearance. His messy wet hair, blue tinted lips and glazed unfocused eyes already dropping shut. She stood up. 

“Reid?” 

JJ looked at Hotch. Didn’t look like he was stopping. 

“Reid, what is it?” Hotch’s voiced sounded concerned. 

The feel in the air felt stiff and dry, unfamiliar and unwelcome. JJ would feel herself start to panic, her breath coming in and out too rapid for her heart to keep up. 

She stood frozen as she watched Reid tumble out of the room, his legs buckling underneath him, hitting his head hard on the floor. 

JJ screamed and rushed out onto the floor, to her friend. His body jerked, muscles spasming. His mouth hung out in a silent scream. Foam flooded around his lips, with tints of scarlet. He seemed to be gasping for air. Reid’s body continued to jerk, the same muscle heaved to do the same thing over and over. 

The blonde agent turned him over, onto his side. His innocent brown eyes started dead ahead, glazed. JJ could only stare at them for a moment when they rolled back, showing white. Her team was next her, some touching Reid, some stand above, knowing they can’t do anything and a voice talking. 

Hotch. It must be Hotch. Hotch had called for medical. He was always prepared. 

So why wasn’t JJ? 

She could fill the tears spill out. Sitting back, she timed the whole thing, letting more and more tears spill. Finally, after what felt so long, Reid slowed and stop. Muscles relaxed, his face returning to a peaceful look. The chocking sound he made died down to a gurgling, to silence. 

And he was still. 

_Deathly still._

NO! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this really small, "What if....Reid got drugged?" and the next thing I know Reid's gettin drugged when he should be having 'dead spirts haunt him'.  
> *shrugs*  
> Can't help myself. I always find good ways to hurt Reid  
> I'm just gonna  
> *inches closer to my bed covers*  
> hide  
> byyyye
> 
> Love, Jovi


	2. Wish You Pain

Reid felt the needle pierce his skin. 

Just that simple touch reminded him all too much of that god-awful shed. And the relief he felt swim his way into his painful body. 

He could feel himself shaking, his limps jerking and tense. The horrible chair and bindings sat limp in the middle of a dark hospital room. Red lights blared and people screamed. White coats and blue masks littered the ground as a laugh echoed around the dark, shadowy red room. 

Reid gazed up. 

Philp Dowd was gripping the chair with white knuckles, smiling. His shaved head glinted against the red lights and his clean teeth pulled strings of rage on Reid’s heart. 

Dowd lifted a pale hand off the chair and beckoned for Reid. He stood there for a moment, muscles still after the jerking fit. 

_But you_ _’re_ _dead._

Reid blinked, not sure if what he was seeing was a dream. 

_I killed you._

Dowd seemed to get annoyed. He growled and glared, gesturing for Reid once again, more firmly and violently. 

_I shot you with Hotch’s gun._

_You're dead_ _._

_I killed you._

Reid still didn’t move. His fear and rage had dug too deep for the doctor to command his body. He could feel it, racing up and down his heart and into his mind, corrupting his thoughts. His legs felt stiff, and his arms felt foreign. His stomach screamed in protest and a sudden pain erupted in his chest and stomach. 

Doubling over, Reid clutched his torso, the pain shooting up to his head, where ice picks were chipping away, and swords buried deep in sand. He felt his legs buckle underneath the sudden heavy weight pressed on his shoulders. 

Gasping for air, with his lungs rattling, he felt tears slip down his pale cheeks. The _drip, drip_ on the shadowy floor echoed, bouncing off the mental walls in his head. He felt the oxygen had vanished from his body, like he’d been punched, and the aftershocks are suddenly coming. 

A hit on the head sent Reid stumbling down onto his pain aching stomach. He could feel his hands shaking again, the jerky movements sending spikes of pain everywhere. 

Something was pressed to the back of his head. A gasp was let out of Reid’s mouth, another catching in his throat. It was cool and smooth, a comforting touch, really. But the agent knew otherwise. He felt it many times he’d lost count how many different ones he felt. 

“ _Confess.”_

A simple commanding voice barked. Reid flinched, the sound smoldering his thoughts. He would never forget the way the voice spat on him, the way it practically willed him to do so. 

_I killed you too._

Another voice piped in: “ _Confess, sinner.”_

The raspy voice slithered into his mind, taking hold like the other. Squeezing his eyes shut; Reid wished it would all go away. He didn’t want to be here again. He hated dreaming about it, even just talking about it would send him down the memory lane he willed to never see again. 

_“It's alright. This will help. It’ll make the pain go away.”_ A friendly voice smoothed. Reid knew what he was talking about. But the relief he got was everything, even though he fought as the needle slid into his skin. But one thought was clear in his mind as Reid gasped for air that wasn’t there. 

_I killed all of you._

JJ sat numbly on the uncomfortable hospital chairs, her legs shaking and her mind reeling. What had happened? One second Reid was siting awkwardly in his chair and the next he’s on the ground, shaking so hard as his limbs had no control. 

The agent felt like she had blood on her hands. The blood of her friend. But looking down, her hands where clean and smooth as they are always were. The only thing on her hands was her sweat; sweat that made JJ rub them on her pants every minute. 

She could feel herself shaking slightly; the feeling you get when you're so hungry and feel like passing out. When JJ welcomed the darkness of closing her eyes, all she would see is Reid seizing, his body jerking sending her into memory. A memory, they would all want to forget, that broke her. 

Reid inside that shed. Reid bloody and bruised. Reid pleading and begging. Reid gasping for air as he was thrown backwards. Reid’s body lurched and twitched. Reid deathly pale and – and _dead._

JJ had watched her best friend die and she couldn’t have done anything but watch. 

And watching had killed her. And watching had killed _him._

Sighing, JJ pulled her hands up over her eyes, the hospital lights at their annoying tip of brightness. 

After Reid went still, everything was a blur. Someone grabbing her shoulder, her resisting. People standing around and people rushing to Spence’s aid. JJ thinks she road in the ambulance with him but wasn’t sure. She wasn’t even sure how she got here. 

With her eyes closed, JJ stared into Reid’s glossy white eyes. The gazed at her, unblinking and unalive. The simple look of her friend's eyes made her shudder. 

“Agent?” 

A gasp caught in her throat. Glancing up, a doctor in blue scrubs, waked up to JJ. Winkles lined at the end of his eyes, making his blue eyes sparkle. He held a clipboard under his arm, the papers different colors. 

“Yes?” JJ asked eagerly. “Is he okay? What happened? Why-why did he...?” 

“Hey.” the doctor looked at her, his eyes gentle. “It’s okay. Dr. Reid is going to be fine.” 

JJ nodded, tears already lining her eyes. “What happened?” She tried again. 

“We looked at his tox screens and it seems he had Lysergic Acid Diethylamide in his system. A large amount of it too.” 

“LSD?” JJ questioned. 

“Hmm. But this isn’t your normal LSD. It seemed it was altered to take effect within an hour or two.” 

JJ stared. Then this wasn’t accidental; someone had purposely drugged Reid. 

The agent was ready to ask another question when the doctor counited. “Seems with the altered product, was some traces of........” His voice went distance in JJ’s ears, but she knew what he said next. She always knew. It was a fear, a fear that the word would be spoken again, and JJ would not like the outcome. 

That’s when JJ’s heart really stopped. 

How dare they – _how dare they –_ drug Reid with those horrible drugs. How could they make him go back to the trauma he experienced during those two days? 

Her heart lit up like a firecracker, its blaze burning everything it touched. The smoke suffocating anyone who stood in her way. JJ could feel the heat blare in her chest, spreading down her arms, making them numb. When she spoke, her voice was a tiny whisper. Didn’t even sound like hers. 

_“_ _Dilaudid_ _?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof. I realized, while writing this that I really love torturing Reid with the whole Revelations stuff. HehehHEHEheheheHEehe. It's sort of fun. Oh well.  
> Sorry this is super short, I'm dealing with some things at home and having a huge writing block. But I hope you enjoy this chapter, I (hopefully) will have another chapter pretty soon.  
> Sorry about that cliff hanger - although it's not much, its something.  
> Comments and kudos are appreciated!  
> Love, you're favorite Bon Jovi fan, Jovi

**Author's Note:**

> I had this really small, "What if....Reid got drugged?" and the next thing I know Reid's gettin drugged when he should be having 'dead spirts haunt him'.  
> *shrugs*  
> Can't help myself. I always find good ways to hurt Reid  
> I'm just gonna  
> *inches closer to my bed covers*  
> hide  
> byyyye
> 
> Love, Jovi.  
> This is to all the tv shows and books that got me through some of the hardest times of my life. I don't know where I'd be without them. #GiveThanks


End file.
